Drew Tries Stuff: The Paintest Paints
I think it’s safe to say that more than a few of us have tried out new hobbies during the pandemic. I wrote about my efforts to learn more in the kitchen that led to messing with infusions a couple of weeks ago, but that has been far from my only new way to spend time. I’ve found a renewed love of puzzles, learned to wield a few new programs on the computer, and even attempted messing around in… the visual arts.
Since I don’t think it’s come up often on here before, this is probably a good point for a quick digression: I’m terrible at drawing/painting/anything along those lines. And I don’t mean that in a “I’m too lazy to put in the work so I’ll dismiss it as talent” way. It’s more that my natural dexterity and hand-eye coordination are such crap that even something as simple as written letters look shitty. If it requires delicacy, I’m just not the man for the job.
Still, when I saw ads for Stuart Semple’s Blackest Black paint, I was curious. It seemed like such an interesting product, and then I dove more into the product line as a whole, discovering he also made unique items like a super powerful glow-in-the-dark powder. More reading got me to the actual backstory about the how and why of Blackest Black coming into existence, which I highly recommend you read. I’m always a sucker for a tale of well-executed pettiness.
By this point, I’d read enough to be genuinely interested in the paints and wanted to see how they functioned. Tempted as I was to dismiss the curiosity out of hand, living in lockdown means always being on the lookout for ways to spice up staying in the same space, so despite knowing I lacked the skill to do anything with them, I bought a few of the paints to test out.
The next question became what the hell was I even going to put them on? A canvas was out, without experience I’d just be smearing paint around and that didn’t sound terribly fun. After some internet sleuthing, I found a few solid options: figurine-minis and decorations. Minis, for anyone outside the tabletop gaming world, are the small figurines you might see someone use on game boards, a plastic representation of their character. Decorations, however, refers to the cheap plastic trinkets on sale from any online hobby outlet, varying by the time of season. Since this experiment was happening around October, I ended up with a bag of plastic pumpkins.
Armed with brushes, several paints, and a variety of surfaces to try them on, I went to work. There was definitely a learning curve on some, though credit to Stuart Semple for creating online tutorials for every single one of the paints. He even kept them simple enough for someone at my zero-experience level to keep up with. Once I found those, things went a lot smoother.
With all that out of the way, let’s get down to how the actual paints performed:
The Blackest Black aka Black 3.0 – As the name implies, this is the third iteration of Blackest Black, although there are more differences in each version than just the depth of color. Black 2.0 has slightly different properties that allow it to adhere better to different surfaces. In fact, it’s recommended that you use Black 2.0 as a base coat, then add Black 3.0 on top.
I tried both versions, doing one area in two coats of Black 2.0, another in two coats of Black 3.0, and the third in a coat of 2.0 with a 3.0 coat added on top. Black 3.0 did turn out to be darker than 2.0, however the far and away winner was the 2.0 base with 3.0 on top. I did a whole pumpkin with that combo and it was a deep pitch black… until I spilled a small bit of the glow-in-the-dark dust on it. I did warn you my dexterity is terrible. But at least that offers us an easy segue into…
The Glowiest Glow aka Lit – Unlike Black 2.0 and 3.0, Lit is a powder designed to be mixed with other paints, such as the base that CultureHustle sells alongside Lit. To use it, you mix the powder with the base, I’d highly recommend using his videos for specifics, and then paint it like any other object. The brag is that it will glow brighter than any other glow-in-the-dark paint and can be recharged an endless number of times.
For this one, I not only used the base they suggested, but also mixed it with a few other colors just to see if it would shine through. The answer was yes on several, however the color of the powder always shines through in the glow, so make sure and pick a color of Lit that goes well with the paint if that’s your angle. Overall, this performed as advertised, save that I didn’t notice at first it was made to work in UV light. Once I got it into the sun and brought it back, the effect was undeniable. However, there was still one unique paint left to try.
The Mirroriest Mirror aka Mirror – While they might have phoned in the title on this one a tad, the product itself is pretty freaking wild. A paint that makes what you put it on look shiny, metallic, and reflective. The substance can’t be used in closed air, so I had to sit out by my back door to paint this one, adding some steps of effort. On the upside, the paint itself is super easy to use. No particular need for a base, nothing to mix with, and it goes on crazy smooth.
As for the advertised effect, it works shockingly well. I mean, I was stunned. Had I not known the pumpkin I painted was plastic, I’d have totally bought it was tin at a glance. While this material does demand extra steps, it’s totally worth it if that chrome-mirror look is what you’re trying to capture.
All in all, I was really happy with my test batch from Culture Hustle. If any of what I’ve described interests you, I’d recommend checking out their site. They sell quality goods, based on what I’ve seen so far. I’ve picked up a few more since then, though I’ve run out of pumpkins so I’ll have to pick a new painting object soon. Perhaps it’s time to go shopping for some plastic pears.