Party Time

                This week has been largely consumed by my usual endeavors: writing, proofing, and editing; but there’ been a third component as well. I’ve been planning a house party for this weekend, as an early celebration of my birthday. There will be the usual events: beer pong, alcoholic archery, flip-cup, etc; however, I also love doing themes for parties. Call it the only bit of theatre in me; themes, especially ones with costumes, just make a party way more enjoyable for me.

                I ultimately decided that Saturday will be an 80’s party, predominantly because I’ve been on an 80’s kick all month, but before I settled I had to consider a lot of other options. Thus, today’s blog post is a list of my favorite party themes. Most of these I’ve thrown or attended, usually more than once, and I can vouch for as being a lot of fun. Enjoy.

*Warning: some of these games encourage, if not require, heavy consumption of alcohol. Please do not drink more than you can physically handle, and always make arrangements for transport if you’re drunk.*

ABC (Anything But Clothes)

                A classic dating back to college, this party revolves around the simple concept that one can wear anything they want to the party, as long as it wasn’t specifically designed to be clothing. Trash bag panchos, duck-tape suits, cardboard pickle barrels, all of these and more are staples of the genre. It’s a chance to make people costume on a cheap budget, and see how much creativity they can muster up.

                Honorable Mention: I once had a friend make and entire cowboy outfit, hat included, out of Keystone boxes and go as the Keystone cowboy. I’ve seen more elegant costumes since then, but never one that reflect such a genuine love of extra-shitty beer.

7 Deadly Sins

                Again, this one leaves a lot up to the imagination. You dress as your interpretation of one of the seven deadly sins: Pride, Wrath, Lust, Gluttony, Envy, Greed, or Sloth. It can be as lazy and showing up with lipstick on the cheek and claiming to be Lust or as intricate as donning a period authentic Brett The Hitman Hart costume to show Wrath. (An aside, if you don’t know who that is, I’m so sorry. Look up 90’s WWF videos and watch The Hitman clean some clocks.)

                Honorable Mention: Guy showed up to one of these with six pizzas, a case of beer, and two cakes and call himself Gluttony. A delicious costume if ever there was one.

Edward 40-Hands  

                Edward 40-Hands is a great American game where you get a bunch of 40’s, ducktape one in each hand of every guest (save for designated driver, who get to laugh their asses off at us) and that’s pretty much it. The condition is that the bottles don’t come off until they’re empty. Both of them. So the night quickly devolves into people trying to grasp things with bottles for hands and steadily deteriorating motor skills. The fun is underscored by the race against time going on in each person’s body where they must consume a huge amount of liquid while fighting their bladder’s increasing demand to let some out.

                For bonus fun, have lots of finger foods available and tell people not to eat before they come.

                No Honorable Mention here, I only went to one of these and no one really stands out, we all had a lot of fun.

Wisest Wizard

                To paraphrase Barney Stinson: Robe Up! At the Wisest Wizard party, you come in any sort of robe you like: a bathrobe, a Snuggie, an actual wizard cloak (I’m a nerd, and therefore have nerd friends), as long as it’s robe-like, it counts. That’s just the first part though; as the host will have stocked the party with predominantly one kind of alcohol: Cans of beer.

                As each wizard drinks down a beer, they ducktape a new beer on top of it. The new beer must be drunk while attached to the old one(s). This called your wizard staff, and the more beer you drink, the longer it grows. He who has the longest staff is the wisest wizard, meaning you get lots of shit-talking rights… until someone powers through a few and passes you up. It grows more difficult as the night wears on, when taking a sip of beer requires lifting a staff of eight cans to your face. Shots and other drinks are allowed, but they don’t add to your staff, which is where the action obviously is.

                Honorable Mention: A friend of mine got to eleven, and had two helpers holding up the end of his staff to finish his last beer. It was an impressive display of drunken resourcefulness. Please note that I give him this honorable mention begrudgingly, because that achievement helped get him so drunk that later in the night he peed on my doormat.

Black Out or Get Out

                I hesitate to put this on here, because not only is it dangerously irresponsible even in concept, but shows how dumb I was in college to hit one of these. The theme is brilliant in its awful simplicity: As soon as you enter the party (unless you’re a driver, who again gets a show) you must chug ten beers or take ten shots, or mix and match as you see fit. Most have the whole 10-minimun round set up in a foyer, allowing you into the proper party once the task is done.

                If you are in a situation where your liver has totally pickled and nothing quite brings a challenge anymore (At the time, I was bartending while in college at a heavy drinking school) then perhaps this is the one for you. Probably not through. Seriously.

                Honorable Mention: Me, for not vomiting that night. I’m one of the very few who can claim that accomplishment, so booyah.

Eat Your Booze

                In this one, all, or at least most, of the alcohol is soaked into food to be eaten by the guests. Gummy bears, watermelon, and pineapple all make great options, but you can get creative with it too. Like Jello shots? Why not a big Jello-mold made from booze-jello? How about a fruit cocktail made entirely of vodka-soaked fruit? Hell, I have a recipe for Sangria popsicles on my computer right now.

                You might want to have some beer and what not to sip in between, but keep most of the hard stuff encased in food. It will make for a weird, and entertaining, sight once the drinking games start.

                Honorable Mention: None. While I’ve thrown half-assed versions of this, I’ve committed to it as a full theme. I think I’ll give it a try later in the year, but with a week to plan there was no way this was happening.


                Alright folks, I those are some of my favorite party themes, but if you’ve got ones I missed feel free to add them. I’m always looking for new ideas. And now, a new segment I'm adding to the blogs. 

                As anyone who spends time online knows, Youtube is the best place to go waste some time. I often scroll through on writing breaks, looking for things that amuse. On Fridays, I'm sticking my favorites in here, because its my site and I can do random fun things like that.

                This weeks is a personal favorite. It stuck in my head like peanut butter and demanded I watch it over and over again. If you're an old school video game nerd, which it seems like plenty of you might be, then enjoy:

Hey Mario by Patent Pending